Well, I wrote this last night as I awaited the coming of my 30^th birthday. I can’t help but think about how much my life has changed in just a short amount of time, although, I feel like it was an entire lifetime ago. I have never really never been a big fan of my birthday, but I love to celebrate others, especially my boys. However, that usually makes me a little sad too because that means they are growing but I love to watch who they are becoming.

As yall know, my past has been a little hard. I have had some hard times and I was once told “it could be worse” or “at least it’s not…” Then I would feel guilty for feeling the way I did. This is where it all begins. Stop saying those words to someone, let them feel the way they should and how they want. No other person has a right to tell another how they should or should not feel. Everyone processes feelings and emotions differently. Over the years, I dealt with some trauma and pain and I’m not ashamed of it, in fact every event has made me stronger as a person and I am proud of where I am and how far I have come.

Someone once told me, “Find 5 things you like about yourself”, over the years I had a hard time finding those things but now, I know who I am, and I want to share some of those with you. The first thing I love about myself is that I have a big heart, I know deep down in my soul that I will go out of my way to take care of people. I love whole heartedly. Another thing I like about myself is I am strong. I have feelings and emotions and I hurt just like everyone else, but at the end of the day I will always pick myself up and say, “I will figure it out”.

I have a lot of things about myself that I don’t love, and I have bad habits I want to kick, and I notice myself doing some of them pretty regularly and if you’re a friend of mine and I get way too excited about something and start interrupting, I apologize, I am working on that. I’ll be honest, most of the time my excitement is something about agriculture… so of course, not everyone has that same passion. I also dislike the fact that I lose my patience way too often, with everything and everyone.

Every day is another step, a step towards a future, a step towards growth and I love every step of the way. I guess what I am really trying to say is although it’s another year, another birthday, when I look back on my life, I am proud of how far I have come. Life is a journey and so many of us take it for granted, we live for tomorrow. Focusing on one day at a time. I refuse to believe the “Life is a bitch, and then you die” if that’s truly how you feel, then make a change and live.